Phoning It In #25!

Current evidence of God's kindness:  The day my Restore Internship ended (August 14th), while I was thrilled about having a break, I was simultaneously feeling a bit of a void knowing I would not be working with clients for the next few months and wondering if I would lose momentum and the sense of purpose.  The very next day, I received a message from Abby asking if I would be willing to serve as the content advisor for her CHA Senior Thesis paper, a new assignment where senior students write a 12-14 page paper about a potential future career they feel interested in... LOVE that CHA is encouraging their women to think about that more now... and love that Abby is an adoptee who is interested in adoption trauma and learning more about psychology and counseling... and love that her mom (her oldest brother was in Rach's class at CHA) thought of me based on my FB post my last day at Restore!! #Godstiming  We will meet at least 5x from now through December, as well as texting and emailing with research ideas, etc.  We met for lunch at the Moore Panera today and really connected well - I loved hearing her story, and I'm excited about getting to work with and encourage her over the next few months!! ❤

More evidence of God's goodness = me seeing this meme yesterday as I was working on a vision board for my future goals... so much of what pulls me toward working as a counselor is the rejection and heartbreak I've experienced, and wanting to help others feel seen + build healthy relationships, a healthy worldview, and healthy self-worth/identity!!  *Tomorrow marks 11 years since the sharpest of the 3 rejections I've endured.  I'm grateful God works all things together for our good and His glory!

Deadpool with the heart-hands brings me lots of joy, as does his "MAXIMUM EFFORT!!" catchphrase when he's ready to fight.  

And now, a few pics from Jaceman's football game last night!

Love them!

Proud grandparents!

What made me laugh on this one is that J misspelled his last name on his FB page with only one R, and his jersey being wrinkled kinda matches that here.

Yay #44!!

They played the Timberwolves and won - go Lions!

The Miss K explaining something to Mom and Dad. lol  I love how expressive she is when she talks!

Yay, football season!!

So I honestly had every intention of going to see The Forge (the new Christian movie with Priscilla Shirer) after my meeting with Abby, but Warren changed up their movie times, so I had to settle for round 3 of Deadpool and Wolverine! lol #noregrets  I think that's the last time in theaters.  In the grand scheme of where I would rank it among movies I see repeatedly, this one deserved 3 viewings.  Any movie I really enjoy gets 2x in theaters.  My Best Friend's Wedding got 5, The Greatest Showman got 7, and Titanic stands strong with 15.

That was followed by a family dinner at the MWC Cheddar's where not one but two of the meals had hair in them... eeeek!  Having said that, the restaurant manager came to apologize and comped several things, so they handled it well and our waitress (Lindsey) was really great!

Moss fam and their lovely newborn photos for Holly Marie! ❤

Friendly tip - Crumbl now sells mini cookies (finally - why on earth did they not do this sooner!?)... this is equal parts fantastic news and dangerous for me to know!  I'll do my best to ignore it for the great most part. 

Our original plan was to walk Thursday and Friday, but thanks to the five blisters on my toes, Friday night turned into an Oliveto dinner night!  We weren't too sad about that. lol

Some throwback pics from SIXTEEN years ago according to a Shutterfly email!

Google Photos showed me this memory from the dinner Jenna hosted, and it made me happy seeing Jessica with the best girlfranz... Sammich being a smiley-puff extrovert and Bellsy looking scared and ready to go into introvert hiding! lol ❤

Another Google Photos throwback to some Snapchat pics from a fam dinner at Judges a few years back!

Jonathan from CCU promoting a sale on his latest book - I'm such a fan of his character and wisdom, and I believe he's destined to do big things!

Google Photos made this fun starburst effect on K's bday pic! =)

Did my brain immediately go to the "Flying V" from The Mighty Ducks movie!?  Yes, yes it did!  Their formation needs a little work, though. lol

Geese just taking over my neighborhood roads whenever they please. lol  I am not their biggest fan, and I'm grateful I didn't get the house by the pond for that reason!

An outdoors pic of me and Megan on our way into Swadley's!  It was super windy, so I preferred the indoor picture, but this one's worth posting too. lol

I'm confident I've posted this before, but it makes me laugh every time I see it!

Asher Kenneth cuteness!

I used this for my #face2faceFriday post in the Blossom support group on Facebook.  I'm grateful to be down 55 pounds and seeing real changes! 

Okay that's really all for today!  This post is a hodge-podge mix of the latest photos from my phone, so I'll go with the "phoning it in" title.  We've made it to the final week of August now.  Tomorrow begins my FINAL semester in the CCU Master's program, and Launch Project Sprint #3 begins September 1st!!  #maximumeffort #finishstrong #letsfreakinggo 

Happy Sunday, and hope it's been a great weekend!  JEM, have a fantastic time in Vegas!  Thanks for stopping by, friends and fam, and take care!!  (And I mean that more sincerely than David Rose. lol)

❤❤❤

Thankful Thursday! (202)

"For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.  Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement allow you to live in harmony with each other by following the example of Christ Jesus."  ~Romans 15:4-5

Today, I am thankful for:

1.  Jace Michael, who is currently in football and karate and still doing regular workouts at Shape - proud of the work he is putting in!

2.  Parker Elizabeth, a decisive preschool class leader ;-) who was excited to have her very first ballet class on Monday - gah, what a preshface!! lol

3.  That God is faithful in so many ways, including this being the verse of the day when I needed it.

4.  The inspiring podcast and free workbook by Mel Robbins on finding what you really want using the 5 Whys (asking what you want, then asking WHY you want that... then asking why again four more times as you keep responding and looking a little deeper).  Sounds simple, but it brings some profound insights!

5.  Catching up with Megan Elizabeth over dinner at Swadley's last night!  So good to see her and get an update on her life and family!!  Also thankful that I can wear the shirt Mom bought me in Vegas now. =)

6.  My 2-hour morning walk at the Station this week... loved the Peloton classes and the nice weather... did not love the five blisters on my toes afterwards.

7.  The productive feeling that comes with cleaning out my closet!!  Everything pictured here will be re-homed, and the clothes that fit me (or will fit soon) now have plenty of space and I can see them more clearly -- YAY!

Side Note:  I really do want to find something to help me with blisters - it's an ongoing problem that typically makes the second half of my races and/or vacations far less fun for me -- if there's a way to fix it, I'd very much like to find it before I walk the lovely streets of Disney World and complete the last 3/4ths of a marathon with painfully blistered feet.  Over the years, I have tried toe socks (that fit around each toe like a glove vs. a mitten) and shoe fittings and various brands of running socks and shoes, but if you have any other specific advice, please let me know!!  I'd also love to find some cute shoes like these for my next race, but I acknowledge the odds of both things happening at once are pretty slim! lol  I'll gladly settle for ugly shoes if it means no blisters!!

*Bonus:  I'm grateful that my Dad got this scary bug off of my car. lol  Ugh, look at it's gross, twitchy antenna and scaly back.  It was clinging hard to my car with its little suction-cup feet, so I drove to Mom and Dad's house from Swadley's to avoid crawling across and getting out on the passenger's side, and I'm gonna say it was worth the drive after what I learned later that night. lol  Google Lens tells me this is a North American Wheel Bug, "America's largest assassin bug" (disturbing) -- they can kinda fly, but it's noisy and clumsy (like June Bugs), and their bite is more painful than a bee sting -- soooo that's a hard pass on all the levels for me!  Having said that, even if I'd learned it was a very peaceful bug that couldn't fly, I'd still prefer it to be nowhere near me. lol

Okay, Happy Thursday, friends and fam!!  I love you and believe in you, and I believe you matter deeply to God and there is a great cloud of witnesses who are rooting for you and cheering you on from Heaven! ❤

Bronze Medal Mindset

Happy Sunday, gang!  I got my final paper done around 2am Friday night/Saturday morning, and it's been a restful and refreshing weekend since then!  Actually, scratch that - today has been really good, but yesterday was rough with feeling emotionally disjointed and overwhelmed thinking about next steps.  I caught up on sleep and made healthier decisions and felt more peace about things today, thank God!

Here's a pic from our family dinner at Ted's tonight (missing the boys).

Yes to this... GET BACK UP.  #resilience #Godsnotdone

Mom, Dad, and the Miss K at dinner tonight... she has me in her phone as "#1 Aunt," and that makes me happy! ❤

Sister Pic!  My first hat purchase in years, but yay for a fun OSU cap in a cute script font!  (The shirt says Shoulda Been a Cowboy and has an orange and black undershirt - fun!!  Rach and I laughed about both wearing long sleeves on the hottest weekend of the year. lol)

Also got this t-shirt and the crystal pink headband that goes with it - YAY!

For the above OSU-gear, Mom and I went shopping at the Painted Tree, a new place in Moore with lots of cute little boutique shops.

Didn't buy this one, but had to get a pic... I gotta be honest, shopping feels infinitely more fun when things are fitting unexpectedly in some smaller sizes!

Saw this irreverently-entertaining gem again on Friday.  My new plan is to be Hugh's second wife so we can be fun couple friends with Ryan and Blake. lolol #mostlyjoking #andiwillalwayslovehugh

Jaceman had a football scrimmage at Moore High School on Saturday morning... didn't love the mass chaos crowd, but it was fun to see him play a bit and fun that there was a booth selling bundtinis! lol #strawberriesandcream #yum

Having said that, I'm reining in the food choices and upping my water intake for the remainder of August (doing a modified version of the pre-op diet and really working on maintaining proper hydration, which has been a challenge).  It's been pretty fun to try on new clothes lately, and I wanna keep that momentum going with healthy choices and regular workouts!  The rule of thumb in the Blossom support group is that you will typically lose half of the total weight you're going to lose by the 3-month mark post-op, which is September 7th for me - I'm so grateful to be in a good and hopeful place with all of that!  Without being fully conscious of it, I've moved from a 22 to a 16 and an XXL to an XL or Large, but I've gotta rein in my shopping ASAP since I'm still actively losing weight and reshaping my body.  Anyway, sorry for all the dressing room pics, but hooray for sizing down and feeling more confident there... And yay for my baby-food tupperware cups for meal prepping my taco soup! lol  

*On a related note, Mel Robbins talks about having a "bronze medal mindset" where you don't expect "gold" level perfection from yourself, and you choose to compare down rather than up - (or ideally, not comparing at all).  She says there are studies showing that bronze medalists are happier than silver medalists because they're aware they could've come in 4th and are thrilled to be on the podium getting a medal, while silver medalists are often comparing up and frustrated that they narrowly missed out on the gold.  The idea is to focus on how far you've come rather than how far you have to go - to choose JOY over jealousy or discontent.  And that resonates with me lately.  I'm not at my goal weight, and there are a million women I could compare myself to and walk away feeling insecure or not enough... but when I focus on my personal goals and how far I've come, I can celebrate this trajectory and feel excited and hopeful right here today (and I do)!

Aww, my future friends. lol  Ryan defines friendship as genuinely rooting for someone to live their best life, and I love that!  Also love that they have the #1 and 2 movies at the box office lately... the first power couple since Bruce and Demi to top the box office together! =)

❤

Okay, almost done.  My song of the week = my pick for Celine's most underrated song, Then You Looked at Me.  She brings all the passion and drama!!  So freaking great - love these lyrics from start to finish - belting it out as I listen tonight, especially the 2:40 mark forward! lol

Runner up = Mom's choice for her most underrated song, To Love You More -- also fantastic!

Have a delightful week ahead!  I love you and believe in you, and I believe that God has us covered even when we feel overwhelmed or uncertain about what is next - He will show us the path of life and open new doors one step at a time!!

❤❤❤

Changing the Narrative

"Communication is about what is received, not what is intended. If there is a gap between what you are saying and what they are hearing, you have to find a new way to say it."
~James Clear

Happy Saturday, friends and fam, and Happy Half-Birthday to me!! ❤ ;-)  Hard to believe it's already been six months since my 40th birthday (blog HERE).  

So I recently spoke with a friend from CCU, a mom of seven, answering a few questions about my dating life and my desire to be a mom.  As I shared the short version of my story, I realized it was filled with compounded pain and disappointment, and I could feel intense pity coming from her.  That response was unsettling for me, but if I'm being honest, I was probably seeing my own self-pity reflected back... rooted in some old beliefs and ungrounded feelings of inferiority due to my singleness and childlessness.  There are so many wonderful things God is doing in my life, but I wasn't focusing on that or voicing them clearly, so this reminded me to be more intentional about how I frame my identity and articulate my own story!

My experience this summer also reinforced this idea.  Initially, I was prepared to communicate my weight-loss surgery decision in a very defensive and guarded manner, anticipating a judgmental response.  That was a blind spot for me, but after a timely conversation with Chet Lee and hearing Mel Robbins' "Drop the Sword" lesson, my perspective changed!  When I confidently shared my decision with an expectation of support, I received genuine support and felt greater peace.  Conversely, had I publicly shared that original defensive post, I would have likely faced mixed feedback and growing insecurity.  Self-protection does us no favors.

God tells us that the power of life and death is in the tongue - and out of the heart, the mouth speaks.  Our core beliefs and our word choices matter deeply in how we perceive ourselves and in how we portray God to others.  The gap between what I say and what others hear highlights the need to find a better way to communicate.  This isn’t about controlling the narrative or protecting my image, but about clearly communicating God's work in my life in an honest way that glorifies Him!  *I'm never responsible for how others respond, but I AM very responsible for my beliefs and how I communicate them.  Self-pity and low self-worth do not honor God.  It's easier said than done, but I want to be so full of Christ's love and confident hope that I naturally view/frame my story as not lacking anything essential.  ("No good thing will He withhold from those who walk with integrity.")  I want to leave people who care for me feeling hopeful and joyful when I share my story, aligning my heart with Christ's heart for me and ensuring that His redemptive truth shines through, even in darker seasons.

2025 will likely be the year I write and publish my first book, so I'm thinking more deeply about the way I internally narrate my own life.  My goal is to write with courage and vulnerability... while emphasizing that any pain and challenges I have faced are the minor themes in my story, where the major themes are deep love, redemptive hope, and growing faith in God's power and abundant goodness!! ❤